34 things I hate about AI content: Types of AI slop that ruin audience trust

I read a lot of AI-generated writing. Like, a lot. Client drafts, LinkedIn posts, comments on LinkedIn posts, newsletters, blog articles people send me to look at. I can spot it in about two seconds now. Not because I'm a great writer. Because AI writes the same way every single time, and I'm tired of it.

It has tells. 34 of them, across six categories. Once you see them, you can't stop seeing them.

So I did the obvious thing. I asked an AI to write a blog post about SEO for small businesses. It came back with 2,100 words of pure slop. Every pattern below showed up in the output (I didn't have to push for any of it).

Here's the field guide (or warning guide if you're using that one tool that creates content at scale).

Word-Level Slop

These are the individual words that scream "a robot wrote this." You see one and maybe you let it slide. You see three in the same paragraph and it's over.

1. Significance amplifiers

Words that make everything sound like the moon landing.

This pivotal update to our content workflow has been a game-changer for the team's productivity.

It was a process change. It helped. That's the whole story. But AI can't just say "this helped." It has to make it sound like you cured something.

2. Tourism and heritage language

AI talks about everything like it's writing a travel brochure.

The agency is nestled in Milwaukee's vibrant creative community, drawing from the city's rich heritage of hands-on craftsmanship.

It's an office in the Third Ward. We do SEO. AI makes it sound like we're a cultural landmark.

3. Hedge words

AI can't just say a thing. It has to protect itself first.

This is arguably one of the more notable shifts in how small agencies approach paid media, and it's worth noting that the impact has been fairly significant.

Count the escape hatches: arguably, more notable, worth noting, fairly. The sentence is backing away from its own point while it's making it.

4. Filler qualifiers

The words that add zero information but make a sentence feel more "written."

We're really excited to share this update with our incredibly talented team, and we're truly grateful for everyone's hard work this quarter.

Take out "really," "incredibly," and "truly." The sentence says the same thing. Those words are AI adding seasoning it thinks the dish needs.

5. Sycophantic openers

The one that makes me want to close my laptop.

That's a great question. I'd be happy to walk you through the differences between these two approaches.

It sounds polite, which is what makes it subtle. But nobody who knows the answer starts with "great question." They just answer. The compliment is filler. "I'd be happy to" is a nothing phrase. Just walk me through it.

6. AI transition words

The dead giveaway. Normal people don't write "moreover" in a blog post. They just don't.

The new process cut turnaround time in half. Moreover, it gave the team more room to focus on strategy. Additionally, client satisfaction scores went up.

Three decent points, ruined by the connectors. Read it out loud. Nobody says "moreover" when they're telling you about something that worked. You say "and." You say "also." Those words exist for a reason.

7. Verb inflation

AI replaces every normal verb with a fancier one. "Use" becomes "leverage." "Make" becomes "craft." "Look into" becomes "delve."

We crafted a content strategy that leverages organic search to bolster brand visibility and foster long-term engagement.

We wrote a plan. It uses SEO to get more people to see the brand and keep coming back. That's it. Crafted, leverages, bolster, foster: four verbs doing a costume change on a simple idea.

Phrase-Level Slop

Multi-word patterns. The phrases AI reaches for constantly. They fill space without saying anything.

8. Meta-commentary

AI loves to narrate what it's about to do instead of just doing it.

It's important to note that the real impact here isn't just traffic. The key takeaway is that we're changing how the client thinks about their funnel.

Two phrases of throat-clearing before the point. "It's important to note" and "the key takeaway is" are both just announcements that a point is coming. The point is the funnel thing. Just start there.

9. Real-truth constructions

AI trying to sound like it's cutting through the noise. It's not. It's adding to it.

At the end of the day, what it really comes down to is whether you're building something sustainable or just chasing the next algorithm update.

Sounds like wisdom. It's not. "At the end of the day" and "what it really comes down to" are AI doing a windup before delivering a take you've heard a hundred times. Drop the preamble and the take has to stand on its own, which is where you find out if it can.

10. Manufactured hooks

The LinkedIn special. AI writes openings like a bad TED talk.

In today's rapidly evolving digital landscape, the way we think about SEO is changing faster than ever.

You've read this sentence. You've read it on every marketing blog published since 2019. "In today's rapidly evolving" anything is AI's favorite way to start a post, and it says nothing. What's changing? How fast? Compared to what? A hook with no bait.

11. Mid-narrative pivots

AI loves a dramatic turn that isn't actually dramatic.

We'd been running the same link building playbook for six months. But here's where it gets interesting: the client's organic traffic started climbing from pages we hadn't even touched.

The interesting part is the observation about untouched pages. That's good information. But "here's where it gets interesting" is AI inserting a dramatic pause before something that doesn't need a dramatic pause. Just say what happened. If it's interesting, I'll notice.

12. Negative parallelism

"It's not X, it's Y" is AI's favorite sentence structure. It uses it constantly.

It's not just about ranking higher, it's about building a content ecosystem that drives real business outcomes.

I see this structure in probably half of all AI-written marketing copy. The first half downplays something reasonable. The second half replaces it with something vaguer and grander. Ranking higher is specific. "Content ecosystem that drives real business outcomes" is nothing.

13. Collaborative language

AI pretends you're doing something together. You're not. It's writing and you're reading.

Let's break down what's actually happening with Google's latest core update and what it means for your site.

"Let's" is doing a lot of work here. There is no "us." I'm writing this and you're reading it. "Let's break down" and "let's dive into" and "let's explore" all create fake collaboration. Just say "here's what's happening."

14. Corporate jargon

AI defaults to business-speak because that's what a huge chunk of its training data sounds like.

By aligning our content ecosystem with the broader digital strategy, we can move the needle on organic visibility and unlock scalable growth.

This almost sounds real. That's what makes it dangerous. "Content ecosystem," "move the needle," "unlock scalable growth": three pieces of jargon stitched together. What does it mean in practice? More blog posts? Better internal linking? Say the specific thing.

Structural Slop

This is the stuff that's harder to spot in any single sentence but becomes obvious when you read the whole piece. It's the shape of the writing.

15. Reflexive rule of three

AI lists things in threes. Always threes. Even when two would work or four would be more accurate.

The campaign showed real results: better targeting, stronger creative, and consistent follow-up.

Sounds reasonable. But was it really three things? Maybe it was two. Maybe the creative didn't matter that much and it was mostly the targeting and the follow-up. AI defaults to three because three sounds tidy. Real answers are messier.

16. Staccato clusters

Short sentences. For drama. Every time.

Traffic dropped 40% overnight. Rankings disappeared. The client called.

This reads like someone trying to write a thriller. Short sentences work sometimes. But AI clusters them every time it wants to create tension, and it starts to feel like a cadence rather than a choice. The third sentence should probably just be part of a normal paragraph explaining what happened next.

17. Section-ending summaries

AI restates what it just said at the end of every section. Like it doesn't trust you to remember the paragraph you just read.

Taken together, these improvements to the technical foundation give the site a much stronger position heading into Q3.

You just spent 200 words explaining the improvements. I read them. This sentence adds nothing, just a bow on top of the paragraph. AI does this at the end of every section, like it's writing a book report and needs a closing sentence for the teacher.

18. Rigid outline structure

"First... Second... Third... In conclusion." AI writes like it's following a five-paragraph essay template from 8th grade.

First, we need to understand where the site stands today. Second, we need to look at what competitors are doing. Third, we can build a strategy based on those findings.

This is AI's default skeleton for any piece longer than three paragraphs. It's not wrong, exactly. It's just the most boring possible way to organize information, and it makes everything read like a procedural checklist.

19. Default redemption arc

AI can't let anything be bad. Every challenge is secretly a gift.

The migration was painful, but it ultimately forced us to rethink our entire content architecture, which put us in a better position long-term.

Maybe. Or maybe the migration just sucked and you lost three months. AI can't leave a negative outcome alone. It has to find the lesson, the silver lining, the growth opportunity. Sometimes the honest answer is "that went badly and we moved on."

20. Question restating

You ask a question. AI repeats it back to you before answering.

When it comes to choosing the right CMS for a content-heavy site, there are a few important factors to consider.

You asked "should I use WordPress or Webflow?" and AI gave you back a restated version of your own question with "there are a few important factors to consider" bolted on. That's not an answer. That's a stall.

21. Excessive bulleting

AI converts everything into bullet points. Prose becomes a list. Paragraphs become dot points. Nuance gets flattened into fragments.

Benefits of the new reporting workflow:

• Saves time on manual data pulls
• Gives the team better visibility into performance
• Makes it easier to share results with clients
• Reduces back-and-forth on status updates

These aren't wrong. They're also not doing any work. Every one of these bullets could be a sentence in a paragraph with detail: how much time, what kind of visibility, which clients were asking for this. The bullet format lets AI gesture at value without proving it.

22. Conclusion that restates the intro

The last paragraph is just the first paragraph reworded. AI bookends every piece by saying the same thing twice in different words.

[Intro] Technical SEO is often overlooked by teams focused on content, but it's the foundation everything else depends on.

[Conclusion] At the end of the day, technical SEO remains the foundation that content teams can't afford to overlook.

Same idea. Different words. AI bookends every piece this way because it learned from five-paragraph essays and blog templates that all do the same thing. If your conclusion is just your intro in a trench coat, cut it.

Tone Slop

The emotional texture of the writing. AI has about three settings and they're all wrong.

23. Relentless positivity

Everything is exciting. Every outcome is incredible. Every challenge is an opportunity. AI sounds like it's on day three of a motivational conference.

We're excited to share that the team has been working on something new, and we can't wait to show you what's next.

This sounds fine at first. Notice the emotional temperature: it's set to "excited" and there's no other setting. AI writes about a product launch, a blog post, and a minor process change with the same energy. Everything is exciting. Everything can't wait. After a while it reads like someone who describes every meal as best food ever.

24. Excessive formality

AI writes like it's addressing Parliament sometimes.

Thank you for the opportunity to present this proposal. Please don't hesitate to reach out should you have any questions or require additional information.

Nobody under 60 writes "please don't hesitate to reach out should you require additional information" in an email. You'd just say "let me know if you have questions." The formality doesn't add professionalism. It adds distance.

25. Manufactured vulnerability

AI doing authenticity is the uncanny valley of writing.

I'll be honest, when we first saw the traffic numbers after the update, it was hard not to panic.

One "I'll be honest" in an otherwise normal sentence. That's what this looks like in real life. The problem is: were you being dishonest before? "I'll be honest" is a signal that the writer is about to perform authenticity, and AI reaches for it constantly because it learned that vulnerability gets engagement.

26. Uniform enthusiasm

AI gives the same energy to everything. A product launch and a policy update get the exact same level of excitement.

We're thrilled to announce that we've updated our reporting dashboard with new filtering options. This is going to make a real difference in how the team tracks campaign performance.

It's a filter update on a dashboard. It's useful. But "thrilled" and "real difference" give it the same emotional weight as launching a new service line. AI doesn't modulate. Every announcement gets the same treatment, and it makes everything feel like nothing.

27. Apologetic hedging

AI qualifies everything to avoid being wrong.

This might not apply to every situation, but in my experience, the sites that recover fastest from core updates tend to have stronger internal linking.

Two qualifiers before one observation. The observation is good. The qualifiers are AI hedging because it's been trained to avoid being wrong. Have the take or don't.

Formatting Slop

The visual patterns. How AI arranges words on the page.

28. Em dash overuse

AI loves em dashes. Loves them. Uses them — constantly — in ways that break up sentences that didn't need breaking up.

Our approach — which combines technical audits with content strategy — has consistently delivered results that go beyond just rankings — the kind of outcomes that actually show up in revenue.

Three em dashes in one sentence. AI loves this move. One can work as an aside. Three turns the sentence into a series of interruptions. The reader has to hold four threads at once for no reason.

29. Bold as decoration

AI bolds random words in the middle of paragraphs for emphasis. It's not emphasis. It's visual noise.

We focus on long-term organic growth rather than short-term wins, using data-driven audits to prioritize the work that actually moves the needle.

Two bolds in one paragraph. Neither is a heading. AI does this to create emphasis, but when you bold phrases in body text it reads like a PowerPoint slide got lost in a blog post. If the point is important, the sentence should carry it. You don't need formatting to do your writing's job.

30. Emoji in professional contexts

AI drops emoji into business writing like it's texting a friend.

Really proud of the team for shipping this one on time 🚀 Big things coming in Q3.

One emoji. In a company update. It's not the end of the world, but it's a tell. A human writing a professional update doesn't reach for the rocket ship. AI does, because it learned from a million LinkedIn posts that all end the same way.

Content Slop

The substance problems. What AI actually says, or doesn't.

31. Vague attribution

AI cites sources that don't exist.

Research suggests that companies investing in content marketing see significantly higher engagement rates over time.

What research? Where? Published when? By whom? "Research suggests" is AI's way of making a claim sound credible without having to source it. If you can't link to the study, either find one or say it's your observation.

32. Semantic hollowness

Sentences that sound smart but communicate nothing. This is the worst one.

Taking a more holistic approach to your digital presence ensures that every touchpoint reinforces the brand and drives meaningful engagement.

Read that sentence again. Slowly. What action does it recommend? What does "holistic approach" mean in practice? What's a "touchpoint"? What counts as "meaningful engagement"? It's a sentence that feels like it's saying something important. It's not. There's no information in it. A warm feeling shaped like advice.

33. Explaining significance

AI tells you something matters instead of showing you why.

This matters because the way Google evaluates content quality is fundamentally changing, and most sites aren't ready for it.

"This matters because" is AI holding up a sign that says IMPORTANT. If Google changing how it evaluates content isn't obviously important to your audience, you're writing for the wrong audience. The facts should carry the weight, not a label.

34. Avoiding specifics

AI stays general because specifics require actual knowledge.

One mid-size ecommerce brand we worked with saw significant improvements in organic traffic after implementing a more structured content strategy over the course of several months.

Which brand? How significant? What does "more structured" mean? How many months? This sentence is technically about a real result but contains nothing specific enough to learn from. AI defaults to this because specifics require knowledge it doesn't have, so it rounds everything off into vague gestures.

None of the patterns above is a disaster on its own. The problem is that they all show up together, every time, in the same proportions, with the same rhythm. That's what makes AI writing sound like AI writing. Not any single tell. The pattern of tells.

The fix isn't complicated. Write shorter. Be specific. Say the thing directly. Stop announcing that you're about to say the thing. And if a sentence sounds impressive but you can't explain what it means, delete it.